Image from www.psychcentral.com

Dedicating to yourself to your personal development goals is a great step in the right direction. When I talk about personal development, it means dedicating time to learn work on your mental fitness, health, skills and knowledge.

Upon completing these goals, you may notice that you have gained some sideline spectators as well. In most cases, you are catching their attention because of the changes you are making. I frequently think that success breeds more success. This means that when we have achieved a small level of success with our work, we tend to have people attracted to what we do. For example, when I started gaining small successes in the speaking industry, I started to get more offers to speak in different countries and seminars.

By gaining someone’s attention, you are serving as an inspiration to others. This often happens naturally and is another big commitment. You have committed to be consistent with your actions and to serve as a role model for others to follow.

If you want to make the most out of this occurrence and really impact other people’s lives positively, you can use the steps below. These steps are designed to create an amazing life:

1. Passion and excitement: A person will usually only serve as an inspiration to others if they are passionate and love what they do. It is a known fact that the more excited someone is about something, the more they will excel in their work. What makes you passionate? Does it excite other people to pursue theirs as well?

2. Goal Setting: Always set goals for what you are looking to achieve. The use of goals has proven to be very effective and allows for a greater commitment factor. It is important to make them detailed so you know when you have actually reached the goal. You can then celebrate the accomplishment of that goal and move on to create another. This will not only keep you motivated, but show others that goals are attainable. In addition, this will get people to draw their inspiration from you and desire for more out of their lives.

3. Go big or go home! You need to set goals to push your limits. By doing so, you will achieve more and really shine to yourself and others. The important thing to keep in mind is to make sure you are not creating goals that are unrealistic. There is a distinct line between goals that are challenging versus those that are just not plausible (eg. walk on the moon without a breathing apparatus).

Another aspect to keep in mind with very challenging goals is to make sure you measure them by performance. In other words, the outcome might not have been the outcome you wanted but you gave your best performance in achieving it. This means that you might fail at times, but knowing that you have given your best shot at it, it is alright to fail. You just need to change completely or modify your strategy and take massive actions on it. Which leads to the point 4 below.

4. Consistency and Persistency: To be truly exceptional, you have to make sure you are reaching goals. Be continuous in your efforts in reaching challenging goals. The harder you work for the goal, the more you will appreciate it. Moreover, persistence, as seen from an outsider, is what really motivates and inspires someone. This persistency in handling problems is what is termed as Adversity Quotient (AQ), where you demonstrate resilience in tough situations. It is not talented people who succeed all the time, but people who have strengthened their AQ over time and are able to keep moving forward even when situations seem bleak or rough.

In my life, I do not always have all the answers, but I know that it is just a matter of time before I find the answers that I seek. I just need to be consistent and persistent in my quest. In my line of work, I never knew it was possible for me to be invited to speak in seminars or even give keynotes because I started out doing small group training (I first started out with only three people in front of me and now it has grown to hundreds) The question I feel is never whether you can or cannot do it, it is always “how can I do it?”. Persistency will pay off if you keep at striving for different ways to make it work. Will you decide to be relentless?

5. Share what you know: It is important, as an inspiration to others, that you share knowledge you have. Let people know how you did it and encourage them just the same. I have personally found that some people just need you to light the fire in their hearts and they will start their search for greatness.

It is important to remember that you need to keep a positive attitude and always look to the future. With doing this, you will not only enrich your life, but you will do the same for others. No man is an island, everything we do affects another person.

Make a decision to inspire someone today! Who will they be? Do leave your comments.

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My son is 15 months old and I asked myself what I would tell him when he is growing up to be a man. It will probably be a letter of hope, encouragement and resilience. I hope that when he grows up, he will keep these words into his heart. I do this to share about the need to influence people towards greatness.

Isaac Trying To Climb Up Daddy's Leg

Do read my personal letter to him:

—

25 Aug 2010

Dear Isaac,

I just want you to know that you are really the apple of my eye. Do you know that every time I look at you, feelings of fondness and love for you will flow out from me? Whenever you lay on your bed and sleep, I will endeavour to steal a glance and watch you slowly drift into sleep. I will walk up next to you, crawl onto the mattress and give a kiss to tell you that you are a beautiful gift that God has blessed mommy and me.

I pray that you will be a man of character, standing strong in a world where values are constantly shifting and eroding. I pray that I too will be such a man that can lead and teach you to do what is right. Sometimes the weaknesses of my soul and flesh will betray me. Even my words may not match up to my actions, but I hope that you will forgive my fallen nature and know that I am a father who is giving his best to teach you life lessons within my capabilities. Focus on building integrity and acting on good intend rather than the outward appearance of looks and impression.

If you handle your inner world in a correct manner, your outer world will be great as well.  Your inner beauty will radiate outwards when you hold fast to the values you are taught. Remember that situations do not make a man, but they merely reveal the size of character in a man.

The world awaits you with much excitement and snares. I am excited for you on how you will handle this journey and yet at the same time concerned for the snares of unpleasantness it can hurl at you.

Whenever life throws you disappointments, failures and heartaches, remember that everything has a season. When you are suffering in coldest winter, remember that spring is coming. When darkness is at its fullness, remember that dawn will break forth soon.

Your perspective and resilience in handling what it can throw at you will set you apart from the rest. Never give up on dark situations, but instead ask how you rise above it. When you keep asking the right questions, I believe that you will find the right answers. Emotional resilience is important in an uncertain world where everything happens so fast. Hold on to God and allow Him to guide you through.

Isaac, I also pray that you will grow in wisdom in handling situations around you. I also know that wisdom comes from making wrong choices. Therefore be courageous in making mistakes because there is always a gem of wisdom that we must learn from every one of them. Mistakes are also a gentle way of reminding us that we are still human and not as invincible as we think we are.

Let love for mankind and God guide your every action. Let it also be the guiding principle of your decision making. People around you may not respond or reciprocate in the same manner, but do it anyway. Love is an intelligent willingness to do what is the best for the other person. It is not a feeling, but an action. Do not let others influence you that love is a feeling and is only there while it lasts. There will be many times you will not feel like loving, especially when you are hurt by others, misunderstood or even hated, but do it anyway. Love need not be done in an extraordinary manner, but just you being faithful in loving people around you, is already extraordinary.

Isaac, remember that your mommy and I will always love you. We want you to know that you are precious and that having a resilient character is important. Be the man you are supposed to be and be a person after God’s heart.

With the sweetest love,

Daddy.

P.S.: I still look forward to watching you fall asleep.

Isaac sleeping on his favourite boaster

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Running To The End Point, Image from www.zimbio.com

There is one trait that totally sets successful people apart from the rest of the other people. This one trait made them rise above the rest and is very well respected by many people. What is it?

The trait that I am talking about is Single-mindedness. All successful people know what they want in their hearts, are very purposeful and single minded in reaching their aspirations. Few people actually know what they want, fewer people actually stay true to their purpose. They get caught up with many other things in life that they lose sight of what really matters and give-in to everything that shouts for their attention.

Why be single-minded and focused? Let me share with you reasons why you cannot afford not to do it:

1. It keeps us disciplined.
The ability to say “NO” to the distractions around you and being clear to move forward is extremely important. This helps you to be focused and clear the clutter on what inattention brings. We also become very purposeful in setting aside time to what’s most important and continue to see it through. It is my firm believe is that you can only say NO when you have a clear strategy/purpose.

2. It yields results.
Being single-minded is not being inflexible, but knowing that you have very clear on the end goals. When I first started my business in training, I wanted to do everything. I started training in eight different topics and this got me nowhere. Much later, I understood the importance of concentrating in being the best I could be and I literally struck off many programs to just concentrate in two core areas; motivation and teambuilding. The results were astonishing! I started to be noticed by magazine writers, newspapers and even was had the chance to speak and train in six different countries around Asia. You need to hold on to your firm convictions and not be easily swayed. Keep working on it and find out how to make it work!

3. It pays well.

Jim Collins, in his book, Good to Great, highlights how companies moved to greatness by just perfecting what they are good at. Their generated cumulative stock returns from end 1975 to 2000 outperformed the market by 15 times, beating great companies such as GE, Coca-Cola and Intel. By just concentrating in relocating all their stalls into convenient locations, using clustering methods (sometimes up to nine stores in a mile), drive through pharmacies and even high margin photo processing services, they increased the profit per customer visit. More convenience led to more customer visits and when multiplied with the increased profits per visit, it threw cash into their company.

Conclusion:

I hoped I have given you compelling reasons to start being single-minded. Start small by deciding to keep to the things you have decided and not waiver on them. Then move on to bigger decisions which involve your life, family and career.

PS: Hope to also hear from you on what are the steps you have decided to take after reading this article.

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Source: http://www.sesc.k12.in.us/

Last night I was walking pass a shop and I saw the words, “Seize the Day!” or “Carpe Diem” (in Latin). I joked with my wife that many people have heard of this phrase, but most end up saying “I will start tomorrow!”

My question is that if it is really worth doing right now, why wait?

Most people want to succeed.

Most people want to do something they like to do.

But really, a few will actually get to do it. Why? I like to suggest that most of them think of starting tomorrow and that’s where the issue is.

What’s wrong with tomorrow? Before I start, let me first explain that it is perfectly to start the next day, however what I am actually cautioning against is the idea of “I will do it when the time is right”.

Honestly, there are many times I don’t know whether the time is right or not. It just comes with an intense desire to see change and the willpower to see things through. To start seeing results, it starts by making a firm commitment to what you have said and the willpower to see it through. The right time to see change is usually NOW.

I remember fondly telling my audiences in my talks that one good way to achieve your dreams is to first WAKE UP! It is only when we wake up, we can get to take action in what we dream about.

Here are some things you can do to seize the day:

1. Do something that you have always procrastinated.
2. Work on that thing/project that you have always been talking about.
3. Spend time with people that you have always wanted to do.
4. Do something Crazy that you have never done before.

So… remember to Seize The Day and oh, by the way…. start Today!

Kenneth eating a cricket in Cambodia

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I am currently sitting down in a Starbucks cafe in Subvarnabhu Airport, Thailand waiting for my flight to Almaty, Kazakhstan. So, I thought to be more productive, I hope to write to you on this topic of Excellence.

I recently gave a few talks to the Immigration and Checkpoints Authority of Singapore, Sime Darby and Domino’s Pizza and can’t help but ask what is Excellence and why does it matter to us? I mean, honestly… why should we display excellence in what we do?

Before I begin, may I ask you what is the difference between Excellence and Perfectionism? (Do answer the question before you read on).

Excellence, to me, is the desire to constantly want to be better in what we do. We look through our processes and system of doing things and want to make them better. This means that processes need to be as carefully thought out as possible and then implemented.

Perfectionism is the whole idea of doing things right. It has to work very well and absolutely have no flaws in the process. It has to be simply… perfect! Anything less is really fowled upon.

I don’t know about you but I find the idea of being perfectionist pretty scary and somehow not very useful. People who are perfectionist in nature tend to criticise everything and also refuse to do anything because they know that things might not work or turn out well. People of excellence, on the other hand, will give considerable thought in the whole process and do what they think its best at that moment. It might not be perfect, but they know that if things are not implemented or done in the first place, it cannot be improved.

However, excellence in what we do is not achieved simply by desire, but also by putting a lot of effort in making sure that we constantly improve our abilities. Ask any athlete who prepares for the Olympics, they have to constantly train and discipline themselves. As a Public Speaker and Trainer, I have committed myself to constantly read and summarise what I have learnt every single month. There were times when I spent many nights just reading and rereading even on topics that I am extremely familiar about. I can recall the countless times where I literally was ‘working on myself’ when other people were watching TV or going out. There is a price to pay for excellence and somehow, it does not come cheap.

So, why subject yourself to hard work and discipline? Here are some reasons that why you must display excellence:

1.    Displaying Excellence is lucrative in today’s society. How many people do you know can actually display intense knowledge and skill in what they do? These people are always rewarded with a much higher pay and return on their time.

2.    Displaying Excellence causes a person to be proud of what they do. It is in every human being’s desire to constantly want to be better in what they do. Your intrinsic self-worth is dramatically increased.

3.    Displaying Excellence commands the respect of people. If you see people doing things extremely well, won’t you envy or praise them? This causes a person to feel proud in what they do and will increase their desire to do things better.

Conclusion
I hope you will display excellence in what you do, whether in your personal or professional life. Anything that is worth doing, deserves to be done with excellence.

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Kenneth speaking to 120 of Becton Dickinson's Asia Pacific Staff

Do you personally think that motivational talks are important? Or is it some kind of high energy rubbish designed to make people feel good for one day and before it dissipates next day?

So… What do the experts got to say?

First of all, I’m a Certified Behaviourial Consultant and according to motivational theory, it is believed that we cannot ‘motivate’ another person. A person can only motivate himself/herself. Therefore, we cannot ‘change’ a person, but we can influence them. We can influence them to a set of thinking patterns and help them create more empowering belief systems that will make them be more resourceful in life. This leads to them becoming more successful.

People have asked me whether motivation really works and my magic answer to them is:

“It depends….”

It depends if this person is open to change.

It depends if this person is currently happy with the results that he/she is getting.

It depends whether this person at this stage of his/her life is hungry to learn.

I have given many talks to multi-national corporations and government agencies. In my experience, no two people are similar in their appetite for learning and growth. One person can be so fired up and talking about the philosophies that I have just shared, while the other person next to him just claps his hands and asks when is lunch break?

Kenneth sharing a personal story

But one thing I know, I can influence a crowd to relook at their lives, look at where they are and how much greater they can be. What I am doing is creating a desire for change and it will be up to them to decide how they want to change their lives. When people understand that they have the power to change and make a difference, they will not want to be the same again.

When you truly empower people, the results are phenomenal. I have a lot of people usually coming up to me at the end of the seminar saying that it has changed the way they think and the principles taught are really useful for the workplace.

CAUTION: Let me warn you… motivation is like eating. You need to feed yourself with a healthy dose of it every day. I mean… can you survive a week just by eating a day? Some people have this weird belief that motivation is a one day thing that will TOTALLY change your live. I see it as a process where we find out what motivates us and bathe in it every day to get the results that you want.

So… back to the question, does motivation really change you and make you successful? It depends whether you choose to let it and then take massive action to make things happen.

PS: If you need someone to get people to be pro-active and change mindsets, you can engage me to speak for your organisation.

Related Readings:

The One Decision That Changed My Life

How to Motivate Yourself for Greater Heights!

Importance of Surrounding Yourself With the Right People

How Do You Change Yourself?

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I got an email from the Straits Times Editor saying that my article will be published in today’s newspaper. Building A Successful Team is something close to my heart and I hope to share this with you.

To read the entire unedited article, click on How do I Create my ‘A’ team?

Other Related Articles:

Have You Heard Of A ‘Self Made’ Person?

Lessons of Teamwork from F1 pitstops

Why Most Teambuilding Programs in Singapore will not work!

Teambuilding Lessons From Growing Orchids

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Everyone makes mistakes, the question is whether we truly learn from them. I personally feel that there is a great deal to be learnt from mistakes, provided it does not crush your spirit.

Things happen in life so that we become stronger and wiser from our mistakes. In fact, in the last 2 years, Deep Impact’s growth as a  Impactful Teambuilding company were a result of mistakes that we made and learnt from. It was the commitment of not making the same mistakes twice that helped us to become much better.

It is also important to learn from other people’s mistakes, so that we do not need to pay the price they have paid for it.

Listen to Starbucks founder and CEO, Howard Schultz  on why Starbucks can command a premium for their coffee, why you need to celebrate your mistakes and Starbuck’s philosophy.

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As some of you know, I am part of the Asia Professional Speakers, Singapore (APSS). As speakers and trainers, we have decided to do what we do best and give back to the community by presenting a seminar called “Raise Your Game”. We will donate all the money we have collected from this seminar to the Singapore Cancer Society.

In this program, you will get to listen to top notch speakers in Singapore on Mindset Change, Increasing Productivity, Attracting people to you, Steps to raise your career, increasing your memory power, service excellence and much more!

Date: 1 Mar 2010
Time: 0845-1730
Place:Singapore
Lecture Theatre 23, 3rd floor,
SIM Headquarters, 461 Clementi Road
Cost: $188

To register or donate, click here.

Here is the line up of speakers:

Play a Higher Service Game in 2010…and Win
Ron Kaufman

Lessons from Everest:
Climbing High when Everyone Else is Feeling Low
David Lim CSP

5 Key Steps to Success to Consistently Raise Your Game
Shirley Taylor

Turning Everyday Struggles into Everyday Greatness
Dr William Tan

Simple Strategies for Becoming a Magnet for Success
Christian Chua

Raise Your Career, Raise Your Team and Raise Your Life!
Michael Podolinksy CSP

Raise your Game by Maximising your Memory Power
Nishant Kasibhatla

To register or donate, click here.

I appeal to that you come for this event. As you learn and be empowered, you are also giving back to the community. Let’s do our bid and show love for our fellow friends.

Do forward this blog link to your friends!

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Kenneth having fun with his participants

From my experience, I have come to know many people who know what they do not like, however, not many people know what they like and what really drives them in life. There are a lot of people who work with a lack of passion or have values that clash with their job scope. This results in a lot of unhappy people.

The question then is “How do you know what you are passionate about?”

Here are some questions that will help you:

1. What are the three words that describe you?
2. What are the things that you really like to do, without getting paid, for long hours?
3. What are the three things in life that makes you frustrated?
4. What are some talents that people say you have?
5. What is your perfect world like?

I truly believe that when you are able to answer the above questions truthfully, your next step is to identify whether there are links between each question and attempt to put them together. Here’s my personal mission statement:

My life purpose is to teach and inspire people to have fun, loving and supportive relationships.

When I see people enjoying their relationships and having fun in the work environment or at home, it gives me tremendous pleasure! This is one of the reasons why I conduct many transformational teambuilding and people related programs. In addition, I give key note address in seminars and conduct talks as well in the people management area. Do not fall into the trap and pursue other peoples’ dreams. I have seen many people trying to enroll themselves in different programs when it is not in line with their personal values and mission.

So, I hope that you will make a conscious decision to identify what you are passionate about and go for it, rather than go through life talking about the things that you don’t like to do.

What’s your passion? Do share it with me in the comments box!

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